wedding night

by jennifer

that night, we got dressed up to go out. to drink and to dance.
and maybe to be a little bit shameless.

i admit it. i was looking for a target.

he was tall, lanky, preppy, and pleasant-looking. white boy from mississippi. in town for a conference.
he bought me and my friends a round of drinks and asked me to dance.

very polite conversationalist, a clownish personality with his friends.
he would dance with other girls, but come around and assure me that he was just entertaining his friends. he wanted to make sure that we had chance to "talk" before the end of the night.

mississippi introduced me to several of his friends, among them a mexican guy named david.
david looked to be in his late 30s, and he looked at me adoringly.

adoringly or not, david did not dance. i asked. he apologized, grabbing my hand earnestly. i really can't dance. i feigned indignance and danced with my girlfriends, with other guys.

after a while, i was tired of waiting for mississippi. he seemed too distracted, so i turned my attention to david, flirting between dances with other people.

as the night stretched on, i noticed mississippi and david leave the bar. i followed them out.
they stopped talking, mississippi turns to me and says, "MV, we were just talking about how great it has been to meet you. you are gorgeous."

"thanks."

he continues, "i'm gonna go ahead and go. but i definitely want to dance more with you tonight."

mississippi walks away, leaving me with david.

we talk. we flirt. i lead him down a hallway. looking for someplace discreet, we stumble upon mississippi and one of the girls he'd been dancing with that night.

david says, "i can see why you like him."

i ignore the comment and lead him outside.

i kiss him. he kisses me back. soon we are touching and kissing urgently.

"you should come back to my hotel."

"no."

more kissing, touching.

"come on. come to my hotel."

"no."

more urging, more negating.

"stop talking!" i tell him. "can't you just enjoy yourself?"

"but it would be more fun."

he kisses my neck hard and bites.

"ok. ok," i tell him. "we better get back."

david tries to be persuasive, but i'm not listening to him any more. my fingers massage my now tender neck.

"sorry," he says.

back in the bar, my friends are frustrated with me for having disappeared. i need to be more careful. i know. i'm sorry.

mississippi comes over and regales me, "i caught you!"

"i caught you," i tell him.

"we caught each other," he says.

"hey," i tell him. "i'm a girl. i've got needs, too."

"i can understand that," he says. "hey. can i give you my phone number?"

"sure," i tell him.

"and you can call me whenever you want."

i tell him, ok, he thanks me, and returns to his friends, including the girl he was with in the dark hallway.

shortly afterward, a waitress comes over and tell me, "i was told to give you this." a folded piece of paper. mississippi's name. his mobile number.

i refold the paper and tuck it into my jeans.

soon, we are ready to call it a night. i wave good-bye to david, and he follows me out. "let me walk you to your car."

all at once, mississippi appears. "hey, MV. you leavin'? can i get a hug good-bye?"

as he leans into his hug, he whispers in my ear, "do you have my number in your pocket?"

"yes."

"call me in ten minutes," he says.

"ten minutes?" i ask.

"yeah, give me ten minutes."

i am still trying to understand mississippi's request as david is trying convince me to go back to his hotel with him. trying to persuade me to give him my number. if not tonight, he promises he can be in austin tomorrow night.

"listen," i tell him. "i need some time to process all of this. you can give me your number if you want."

"do you have a pen?"

"no."

"well, how am i going to give you my number?"

"i don't know."

"fine," he says and turns, walks away.

i roll my eyes at his retreating figure and join my friends.

my thoughts return to mississippi. ten minutes? he passed me along to his friend and now he wants me to call him in ten minutes? what is he going to do with that other girl in ten minutes?

my friend and i returned to our own hotel room that night, telling stories, laughing, and poking fun at the men who had tried to charm us into their rooms.

i stripped off my sticky clothes and got ready for bed. i smelled of smoke and sweat and alcohol. looking at myself in the mirror, i could see the smudged eye makeup, the matted hair. and the hickey on my neck. the hickey that would necessitate my use of scarves and chokers all week at work. i had worn myself out.

this is how i spent his wedding night.
his name is david by the way. i've never written that before.
but that is his name.
david.
i made out with another david on my david's wedding night.

and then i slept like the dead.